Hello and welcome to The Midge, the e-bulletin that takes a bite out of politics in Scotland and elsewhere. 

Front pages

The Herald:

In The Herald, education correspondent Andrew Denholm reports on a warning from an influential education charity that Scotland’s brightest pupils are trailing behind able pupils in England “in most subject areas”. 

“The UK’s shame” is the headline in The National, which reports on a UK Government initiative meant to take in 3000 unaccompanied child refugees but which has been halted after just 350.

“PM accused of closing door on child refugees” is the Guardian’s headline. 

The Times says big brands have been unwittingly funding extremists by advertising on websites. 

The Mail continues its campaign to eliminate plastic bottle waste, reporting that Holyrood’s environment committee is to look into the paper's idea for a 10 pence refundable charge. 

“History is made as MPs finally back Brexit” declares the Telegraph, which also reports on continuing rumours of Jeremy Corbyn’s departure as Labour leader. 

The Sun asks: “It’s Brexit … and Jexit?”

The Herald:

Exclusive: in the Evening Times, Catriona Stewart reports on a row over parking outside a Glasgow school. 

Camley’s cartoon

The Herald:

Camley finds one petrol station giveaway easy to resist. 

FFS: Five in five seconds

What’s the story?

SNP MPs have earned a ticking-off from Commons Deputy Speaker Lindsay Hoyle. 

Another one?

Yes, this time for humming/whistling the EU anthem, Beethoven’s Ode to Joy, during last night’s passage of the Article 50 bill. Patricia Gibson took on the role of conductor. 

What did he say?

After a bellow of “Order!”, Mr Hoyle went on good-naturedly: “I don't want a sing-off in the chamber. It’s very good of you, much appreciated, but if you’d just leave it for a little while. It’s been a very tense week."

A sing-off? Are we witnessing the end of the UK in the EU and the birth of a new Saturday night light entertainment show?

One doubts it. It was not the only behaviour to raise eyebrows last night. One SNP MP's footwear prompted a comment from a Tory MP:

What next?

Disappointingly, the Commons is going into recess between February 11-19, so it’s back to Let it Shine and The Voice for your warbling entertainment needs. 

Afore Ye Go

The Herald:

“It gives me great pleasure to say this, that the barracking of honourable members opposite and the preventing of SNP MPs from speaking in this House plays right into our hands and results in headlines like this - 'Support for independence surges’."

The SNP’s Joanna Cherry cites yesterday’s front page of The Herald. 

The Herald:

“The somethingImadeupearlier.com department”

Where rumours that Jeremy Corbyn was to stand down came from, according to party sources. But Ladbrokes have cut the odds on Clive Lewis becoming the next Labour leader to 5-1 following his rebellion in the Article 50 vote and subsequent resignation as Shadow Business Secretary. Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images.

The Herald:

“All the good vibes of Theresa May’s Washington visit may have been forgotten. Vital diplomatic work may have been trashed. All because this vicious, careerist, small-minded martinet felt like getting something off his preening chest.”

But come on, Quentin Letts of the Daily Mail, tell us what you really think about the Speaker, John Bercow (above) saying Donald Trump was not welcome at Westminster. Tom Dulat/Getty Images

The Herald:

"I am to be executed like a criminal at eight in the morning.”

The last letter of Mary Queen of Scots, which went on display at the National Library of Scotland in Edinburgh for one day only to mark the 430th anniversary of her death. Jane Barlow/PA Wire 

The Herald:

“It can cast the person with whom you may have shared a sofa and a curry on a Sunday night for the past ten years in an entirely different light. What could be more romantic than that?”

Sarah Vine, Mail columnist and wife of Michael Gove MP, says upheaval, of the kind the Goves experienced after the EU referendum and his sacking, can have its benefits. 

Donald Trump takes issue with a department store for dropping a clothing line by his daughter Ivanka.

Former Labour spin doctor Alastair Campbell was among those unimpressed by this use of presidential time.

The Herald:

“[The President] regrets it every day.”

A source close to the Trump administration on the hiring of Sean Spicer as White House spokesman. An official denied the claim to CNN. According to the website Politico, the president saw McCarthy’s SNL turn (above) and was upset at Spicer being played by a woman. "Trump doesn't like his people to look weak,” a source told the site. 

GQ adds to Mr Spicer's woes.

The Herald:

"Ain't it pathetic, your faith in the healing powers of a cup of tea! … The Englishman's panacea! Mother just died? Oh what a shame, have a cup of tea. Just been run over? Never mind, have a cup of tea. I have been offered tea for disasters, funerals, operations, floods, wars, Dunkirk, the Blitz, coronations, piles, hysteria, hunger marches and insomnia. Nice cup of tea in one hand and thumbs up to the camera in the other... Britain can take it! Well they can have it." 

Harold Steptoe, Steptoe And Son. In tribute to Alan Simpson of Galton and Simpson comedy writing fame, who has died aged 87. Justin Tallis/PA Wire

Thanks for reading. See you tomorrow. Twitter: @alisonmrowat