Bee in his bonnet
THE Herald’s archive picture of the Scottish Motor Show at the Kelvin Hall reminds Keith Bruce: “On November 14, 1973, the nation was granted an extra public holiday to celebrate the wedding of Princess Anne and Captain Mark Phillips. My school mate Allan and I decided to try to escape the saturation coverage by going to the motor show. There, alas, we found the models who were employed to drape themselves over the vehicles in those less enlightened days gathered round a couple of portable tellies watching the broadcast from Westminster Abbey.”
This didn’t seam right
WE mentioned ironing denims, and Euan Kerr in Kirkintilloch recalls: “When I was a young apprentice electrician in the 60s, my mother once ironed my overalls, but with the seams down each side of the legs, not back and front. Not a good idea on a windy building site in February.”
Getting it in the neck
CHRISTMAS presents are being bought and a Glasgow father tells us: “This is when the kids discuss what to get me for Christmas. One of them insists on a shirt, the other suggests socks.
“So the argument always ends in a tie.”
Nobody’s mug
TALKING of presents, there is still time to buy The Herald Diary compilation, subtitled That’s The Sealiest Thing I’ve Read. It includes the reader who told us about her doctor having a mug on his desk which had printed on it: “Please do not confuse your Google search with my medical degree.”
Irresistible
AND a Bearsden reader who helped his wife wrap the Christmas presents says: “No matter how old I get if you give me an empty Christmas wrapping-paper tube I’m going to hit someone on the head with it.”
Falling on deaf ears
OUR mention of the Glasgow Subway’s 120th birthday reminds a reader of the driver announcing over the Tannoy at Hillhead station to a packed train: “Could passengers please move up the carriage?’’ When no one moved this was followed by an even more deadpan announcement: “Could passengers please assist the passengers who are deaf to move up the carriage?’’
Eau de Subway
GOING further back, older readers still talk wistfully of the Subway smell before it was modernised. We always thought the best description was given by reader William Haddow, who described it as: “Warm and slightly stale, a sweet and musty mixture of fag and pipe smoke, vinegar in newsprint chip-pokes, damp and decaying brickwork, Brylcreem, and Alberto VO5, all cut through with the acrid electric smell of hot insulation and burnt carbon.’’ Now that’s nostalgia.
Bitter pill to swallow
A READER muses: “Why are there never any good side effects with medicines? I’d like to see one that reads, ‘Warning, may make you handsome and funny’.”
Sylvester steps up
MORE on our Christmas competition to remove one letter from a film title and make a more interesting one. Today’s contenders:
l Goodbye Mr Hips - orthopaedic staff wave farewell to another successful replacement patient. (James Robertson)
l The Jungle Boo - Celtic fans express anger as team lose a game at Parkhead. (Ian Mouat)
l Robin Hod - weepy tale of a labourer who steals bricks to build houses for the poor. (Cameron Bell)
l Twelve Years a Slav” - biopic about Melania Trump’s battle to get an American passport. (Robert Menzies)
l Ocky - Sylvester Stallone takes up darts. (Malcolm Campbell)
Champagne dinner for two at the Urban Bar and Brasserie in St Vincent Place for the winner.
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