It’s been a good week for ... health tips

Nutrition gurus have moved the bowl-posts yet again. Having persuaded the public that five fruit and veg portions is the daily zenith, another bunch of scientists comes along and tells us to listen up, swallow hard and bolster our bowels for a target of 10 a day.

There we were, with that wee five-a-day mantra going round in our heads as we devised ever more inventive recipes for turnip cake and kale curry, when along comes another health mountain to scale.

Apparently, 10 daily portions of fruit and veg may give us longer lives. Unfortunately, the extra years will be spent chopping, grating and chewing.

The study, by Imperial College London, calculated that such eating habits could prevent 7.8 million premature deaths each year.

This news is, of course, a good thing. But have the scientists considered the stress this 10-a-day burden will add to our lives? Will lunch breaks be extended to accommodate these extra munching targets? And what about all those pulled muscles and strained backs carrying supersized packed lunches around?

I think the boffins should get back to their labs and have a rethink.

Scotland will implode if it has to eat any more veg.

But perhaps this new diktat is just a ruse. Maybe the health police reckon this ambitious target will make us so busy chopping and chewing, we won’t have time to slob on the sofa, eat chips or drink beer. A cunning plan, or just another carrot on a stick?

It’s been a bad week for ... health tips

A scientist in the US claims that fitness apps could be "doing more harm than good". Dr Greg Hager, a computer science expert, says "very few" of them have any basis in scientific evidence.

Many of the most popular ones set users a target of 10,000 steps a day. But Hager says this is actually a pretty arbitrary goal, based on a single study carried out in Japan 50 years ago.

Hager, a professor at John Hopkins University, Baltimore, says these devices are often disconnected from science and argues chasing arbitrary goals could have a negative effect.

Those on the 10-a-day regime, however, needn't worry about their activity levels. They'll take at least 10,000 steps daily just running to the loo.